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Things that make you go hmmmm… No wait, I mean WTF?

March 15, 2012

I’ve seen some things, some “WTF? LOL” things, and I wanted to write them down so when I get old and forgetful I can come back here and relive the moment.

– I went to Phoenix with my family for Christmas one year which of course meant a trip to the Grand Canyon. Did you know it actually get’s all snowy and treacherous there in the winter? I didn’t so I was WAY under dressed! A bunch of people were slipping on this really icy patch on a walkway to one of the MANY lookouts (after about three of those I was ready to go back to the house we were staying at). Of course the biggest burliest dude was the only one to actually fall. My very pregnant sister than heartlessly pointed and laughed at him heartily which caused more people to witness his embarrassing mishap. I verbally acknowledge it by laughing and saying “Oh my god, are you ok?”. His face turned bright red and he shuffled off mumbling incoherently.

– I was walking home from the subway station after a long day of work. A surly old (like should have had his license taken away old) man almost ran me over at a stop sign. Then the a-hole gave me the stink eye, the nerve! He took off without looking and smashed into oncoming traffic right in front of me. I pointed and laughed.

– I was walking with a co-worker going for lunch or ice cream or something and an amusingly fat dude wearing only 70`s style red shorts, knee socks and running shoes riding a matching red scooter drove by us. It was all we could talk about for around 5 minutes…and periodically since it’s come up in conversation.

– I was riding the subway with my boyfriend and a fabulous black chick with an amazing afro got full on nude and started talking crazy! Don’t make eye contact, she might start making sense.

– I was walking to the subway with my friend after a party and a mysterious masked man in a trench coat flashed us and flipped his dick around like a helicopter, than ran away giggling! I pointed and laughed, I think my friend gagged and tried to verbally shame him. A chivalrous bystander offered to beat him up for our honor. I told him to leave the naked man alone, you know, cooties and all. Plus kudos to that guy for going with a cartoonish form of exhibitionism.

– I was walking through the upper class shopping district on my way to meet some friends for drinks when an uber fabulous black guy wearing a full length fur coat trailing on the ground, a cowboy hat and riding a motorcycle drove past me.

Why do I never have my camera handy in these situations? I should try to draw them from memory. An update may be in order at a (much) later time!

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